Cowboys Are Frequently Secretly Fond of Each Other

        by sidewinder (sidewinder72@earthlink.net)



        Archive to: Shanghai_Slash, FF.N, and my homepage only, thanks.

        Rating: very, very PG

        Summary: One night after dark, the boys have a little chat.

        Author's notes: Eh, it's not my greatest work, I'll freely admit, but it's something I started as a kind of experiment ages ago that I was determined to finally finish. The title comes from a song by the Pansy Division (thanks, Feklar!)

        Disclaimers: The characters aren't mine, the universe isn't mine, and I'm just borrowing them for a little fun, no profit.

        * * * * *

        "Sun's gonna go down soon. We'd best make camp for the night."

        Chon Wang looked out at the stretch of wilderness ahead of them. The thick forest they'd been riding through had thinned, slightly, but they were still a half-day's ride from Carson City. Stopping now did seem like a wise idea. They could catch some sleep, rest their horses, and be back on the trail right after sunrise. There was no emergency back home that they knew about, no need for them to push on through the night. Chon turned to his partner, Roy O'Bannon, and asked, "Here is good?"

        "As good as anywhere else. If my horse is as tired as I am, she ain't up for much more riding tonight. Besides, I know this area. There's a little stream right up ahead where I can get us some fresh water."

        The two men slowed their horses to a stop and dismounted. Roy took their canteens. "I'll be back in a few. Maybe you can get a fire started; it's gonna get cold tonight."

        Chon nodded, and Roy took off. Chon spent a few minutes fussing with the horses and going through their packs, taking out what they'd need for camp. Then he gathered up some kindling to build a campfire.

        This routine had become a familiar one. As lawmen they spent more time in the wilderness, on the trail of bank and train-robbing gangs, than they did in Carson City. Chon had grown used to this life-- camping out in the wild, riding for seemingly endless hours every day--and Roy was already accustomed to it, thanks to his days as an outlaw. Theirs could be a lonely life, certainly, but they had each other, and over the past few months their relationship had settled into a comfortable companionship.

        Dusk had fallen and night was threatening to cloak the forest in darkness by the time Roy returned to the campsite. His hair was wet, the blond strands curling around his forehead and the back of his neck. "Sorry I took so long," he apologized. "I just wanted to freshen up a bit while I had a chance."

        A small fire was burning and Chon had laid out what remained of their food rations. "Not much left tonight," Chon told Roy as he sat down in front of the fire, across from Chon. After being on the trail for nearly a week now, all that was left was some beef jerky, a hunk of stale bread, a few rice cakes and some apples Chon had been saving as treats for the horses.

        "Yeah, well, it'll do. Too late to go huntin' for anything." Roy tore off a piece of the bread and chewed on it. "First thing I'm gonna do when we get back to Carson City is I'm gonna have me a big ol' steak--and an even bigger bottle of whiskey to wash it down."

        "You drink too much, Roy."

        "Never when I'm on the job. I only drink when I can afford to relax and kick back for a few."

        "But still, it is not healthy."

        "You're my partner, Chon, not my doctor. I don't want to hear it."

        Chon raised his hands in defeat and dropped the subject.

        Dinner, such as it was, then passed with minimal conversation, at least on Chon's part. Roy chattered on about various matters, mostly things of little importance. Chon nodded and commented occasionally, but for the most part simply sat, eating and watching Roy. When the very simple meal was finished, Roy busied himself with cleaning his gun. He was always very methodical about keeping his prized weapon in pristine, polished condition. Chon watched silently as Roy worked. After a while Chon finally drew his eyes away from his companion and let out a small but audible sigh.

        Roy put his gun back in its holster, then just sat there across the fire from Chon, arms hugging his knees, eyes focused on something out in the distance. He smiled slightly as he spoke. "It's nice out here, ain't it? I like being out in the wilderness, under the stars, don't you?"

        "It's hard to see the stars through all these trees," Chon pointed out as he looked upward.

        "Yeah, well, you know what I mean. I guess I was just made for this kind of life. My father wanted me to stay in school, become a lawyer or politician or something, but I couldn't deal with that, you know? No freedom, no fun, no fame and fortune to be found."

        Chon said nothing and merely nodded his head, as he had been doing most of the night.

        "You okay, partner? You're awful quiet tonight."

        "I am fine, Roy."

        Roy shrugged. "I thought maybe you had something on your mind. I mean, I'm used to you being the strong and silent type, but not this silent."

        "I..." Chon started, but then he shook his head. "It's nothing."

        "If you say so." Roy poked at the fire with a stick. "It's just, if it was something, you could tell me about it. That's was friends are for, right? You've got a problem, you tell me about it, and maybe I can help you out."

        Chon hesitated for a minute, looking at Roy, then he dropped his gaze to look into the fire. "I was just thinking about someone," he finally said.

        "Someone, huh. Any particular someone, someone I know?"

        "Someone special to me. A friend, but...I wish we were more than friends."

        "Ah." Roy nodded his head and grinned a little. "I think I'm getting the picture. You're trying to figure out how to get busy with Princess Pei Pei, is that it?"

        "Get busy?" Chon repeated with a frown.

        "Be more than friends--get romantic, if I'm understanding you right."

        "Oh. Yes. But it's not Pei Pei."

        "Someone else?" Chon nodded. "Wow, Chon, you've been holding out on me here. So this special someone you got the hots for...is she pretty?"

        "She..." Chon paused, smiling a little before he continued, "She is everything I could want."

        "So why don't you just tell her how you feel? What's the problem?"

        Chon's smile faded and he shook his head. "It is not so simple, Roy."

        "Of course it is! You go up to this pretty lady of yours and you say, 'I like you, darlin', let's get naked.' How hard is that?"

        "She would not understand my feelings. She would think they were wrong."

        "Why?"

        "This society would not accept our kind of relationship. It would not be considered proper."

        "Some kind of cultural thing, you bein' from the East, her being from the West?" Roy asked.

        "Something like that," Chon confirmed.

        "But you care about her enough that it doesn't matter to you, right? You love her anyway. Hell, I'm guessing from the way you look so torn up about it that you couldn't NOT love her, even if you tried."

        Chon nodded. "I have tried. But I cannot change how I feel."

        "Well then, maybe you're being crazy not telling her, 'cause maybe she feels the same way that you do."

        "I do not think that is possible."

        "How do you know? Have you asked her?"

        "No."

        "Then ask her and find out!" Roy insisted. "Maybe all the time that she's known you, she's been crazy about you, too, but just completely terrified about it, because of all that society hooey like you were talkin' about. Maybe it also scares her 'cause she's never felt like this about anyone before! Maybe you're so different from anyone she's ever known, she's scared shitless, but that doesn't mean she don't love you, too."

        Chon watched Roy intently. He listened to the fire in Roy's voice as he continued, "Chon, one of you is gonna have to say something, or else you could both go on for the rest of your lives, never knowing, never getting the chance to see if you could work it out."

        "But, if she does not feel the same way as I do, I could lose her friendship. I don't want that to happen."

        "If she's really your friend, you won't lose her. A real friend'll stick by you, no matter what. Like the way I'd stick by you, through anything. You know that I would, don't you?" Roy asked, his eyes never leaving Chon's.

        "Yes. As I would stick by you, Roy."

        "Well okay then. As long as we're clear on that." Roy finally looked away, up into the treetops and the night sky peeking out between them.

        The two men fell silent for several minutes, the only sounds the crackling of the fire and the occasional hoots and calls of the nocturnal birds and animals.

        "Roy?"

        "Yeah?"

        "I was not entirely truthful. This someone...is not a woman."

        "Uh huh."

        "That does not bother you?" Chon asked.

        "Well, it depends on who this not-woman is. I mean, if it's me, then we're fine. If you're talking about some other guy, though, then we're gonna have some serious problems here."

        Chon looked at Roy with shocked, wide eyes as Roy smiled wryly. Eventually Chon smiled too, and lines of worry that had been set in his face for weeks faded away. "It's you, Roy."

        "I kind of had a feeling it was."

        "So, should we...'get busy', then? Or was it 'get naked'?"

        Roy laughed, and then replied, "Well if you're askin' me, I'd say we should do a little of both."

        And for rest of the night, they did.

        * end *



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